We Are Done with the iPod

It is finished.

Case closed.

The Prez never wanted them. But he agreed finally.

15 months was enough.

One is broken. Two are strangely missing (actually this happens a lot). One is tucked away at the moment.

I’m certain and the Prez will be thrilled with my certainty.

They aren’t coming back.

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If you have a child or have had a child who has basically disengaged with everyone and everything and is desperate for his iPod at all costs, then you understand.

If you don’t understand, be very grateful.

We have three children who are not addicted to games like mine craft and roblox and clash of clans.

Then we have another who is addicted. It has changed him. In a bad way.

The Lord has repeatedly brought a particular Scripture to my mind in recent days. It wasn’t just for me, though I desperately needed the Word too.

But I am certain it was the voice of The Lord for our son too, one of the ones whose actions and attitudes have brought the Prez and I to a place of desperate, face-to-the-floor prayers.

“LORD, bring them back to You. You say You never let go. Why does it seem like You have?”

And then this over and over again:

“Finally,brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

Philippians 4:8

The iPod as it was here just doesn’t line up with this Word. It is the opposite.

I don’t know what tomorrow holds, but I know the iPod isn’t going to a part of our home anymore.

They aren’t welcome in our home anymore.

The Decision to Not Homeschool

In an earlier post, I referenced the fact that two of our children will be going back to public school next year. One of my readers asked if I might share how we came to that decision.

I definitely can’t go into the nitty-gritty details of why, but I know it must be a question for others. I am literally asking the Lord to show me HOW to do this because homeschooling has been what we do for nearly 5 years now.

I am not sure how to start and where to stop.

I have alluded to the fact that we’ve been dealing with some issues here in our home, and I have shared before about the difficult journey we’ve found ourselves upon as parents to children from hard places and/or with problematic behaviors.

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I just can’t go into a lot of details, but I will say in general that lack of respect is a major sticking point. I remember a seasoned homeschool Momma telling me years ago that it is impossible if not extremely difficult to teach your own children if they have a general lack of respect for you and/or don’t respect home rules in general. That is definitely a place we’ve found ourselves camped out for quite some time with some of our children, despite what I think are our best efforts (if exhaustion is any indication) to try and redirect them. Continue reading

About a Boy (Who Happens to Have One-Sided Deafness)

Please allow me a blog post to BRAG on our youngest little man. He is 8 1/2 and has been home with his forever family for 45 months now. He spent his first 60 months of life on earth in China in a rural orphanage. Statistics show that most institutionalized children will exhibit one month of delay for every 3 months spent in an institution. For our little dude, that translates to 20 months of delay or him being roughly 3 /12 years developmentally when he came home. He was far from it, testing at around 2 years developmentally that first summer home.

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He is such a little love. Actually, he is becoming a big little love, and I predict will be taller than his Momma by the time he reaches double digits.

But back to this boy, who does happen to be deaf in one ear. If you’d like to read more about unilateral deafness, ASHA has a great page that sums it up and helps others to know what to look for in a young child who might be unilaterally deaf.

Continue reading

What Is Homeschooling?

I get asked a lot or rather people will just say (rather than ask): “I don’t see how you do it. Teach all of them at different levels and ages. I couldn’t do it.”

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{Deep breath.}

I don’t teach them all.

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GASP. (Did any of you just gasp?) Continue reading

This Christmas

I love Christmastime. This year though, my heart hurts. I don’t recall a Christmas like this one where I honestly am looking forward to it all being over. If not for my little ones especially, I think I would just skip it. Thankfully, the Prez and some of our children decorated one afternoon while I was gone. I came home and found many things already out.

We all decorated the trees together, but a lot of things just haven’t been the same. You see, I had this wonderful dream that this home would be so special because it would be the first home where all eight of us have lived from the beginning TOGETHER.

But now, that dream has died because in all honesty so much sorrow has happened here already. The vision I had of this first Christmas in our new home, the one we dreamed of for years, didn’t work out. Since just before Thanksgiving, everything we knew to be true has been clouded with the reality that more was broken here than even we already imagined.

I know Christmas isn’t about family times only, far from it, but since 2008 and especially since 2010 it has felt like we are trying to be the family God has brought together through birth and adoption … and we just can’t quite get there.

But now I realize I can’t force it. The Prez can’t force it. Sure we are a family, but the roots I had hoped and prayed … oh how we’ve prayed (yet people will say “if you just pray”) would develop … so many of them that appeared to be there were not rooted as I thought and then others … have never taken root. I love all of our children so deeply, and that is why it hurts so much I think. When our children war against one another in one form or another, oh how it breaks a Momma’s heart.

I don’t know about anyone else, but if you like me, have dreams that have been dashed, a heart that feels like it has been broken in multiple places, a home that just is filled with reminders of all that is broken, a grief that seems almost too much to bear ... just keep holding tight to Jesus and never, never let go.

If you are suffering from a broken heart, maybe one or both of these songs will be a blessing to you.


I do sincerely wish you a Merry Christmas. May 2014 be filled to overflowing with HOPE for you. I know I’m hopeful for the sun to rise and I will continue believing in Jesus’ promises, particularly that His mercies are new every morning.

Do You Have Child with ADHD?

I do.

I used to think all sorts of things about ADHD. Maybe you did. Or maybe you still do.

Doesn’t really matter to me or my son or anyone else with ADHD. What does matter is that if you are the parent of a child with ADHD, I understand.

Is yours the one at the grocery store who is cussing you out because you said no to the soda or the candy?

Is yours the one who tells you for the 10th time in a day that he wishes some type of harm would befall you?

Is yours the one who struggles every day to complete simple tasks that to most of us are just second-nature?

Or maybe your child spends more time and energy refusing to feed the animals than it would take to just do the work?

Or perhaps you like me wonder what in the world will happen to a child who refuses to respect your authority at all costs? Continue reading